WAIT

Desperately, helplessly, longingly, I cried:
Quietly, patiently, lovingly God replied.
I plead and I wept for a clue to my fate,
And the Master so gently said, "Child, you must wait".
"Wait? You say, wait! " my indignant reply.
"Lord, I need answers, I need to know why!
Is your hand shortened? Or have you not heard?
By faith, I have asked, and am claiming your Word.
My future and all to which I can relate
Hangs in the balance, and You tell me to WAIT?
I'm needing a 'yes', a go-ahead sign,
Or even a 'no' to which I can resign.
And Lord, You promised that if we believe
We need but to ask, and we shall receive.
And Lord, I've been asking, and this is my cry:
I'm weary of asking! I need a reply!
Then quietly, softly, I learned of my fate
As my Master replied once again, "You must wait."
So, I slumped in my chair, defeated and taut
And grumbled to God, "So, I'm waiting.... for what?"
He seemed, then, to kneel, and His eyes wept with mine,
And he tenderly said, "I could give you a sign.
I could shake the heavens, and darken the sun.
I could raise the dead, and cause mountains to run.
All you seek, I could give, and pleased you would be.
You would have what you want - But you wouldn't know Me.
You'd not know the depth of My love for each saint;
You'd not know the power that I give to the faint;
You'd not learn to see through the clouds of despair;
You'd not learn to trust just by knowing I'm there;
You'd not know the joy of resting in Me
When darkness and silence were all you could see.
You'd never experience that fullness of love
As the peace of My Spirit descends like a dove;
You'd know that I give and I save.... (for a start),
But you'd not know the depth of the beat of My heart.
The glow of My comfort late into the night,
The faith that I give when you walk without sight,
The depth that's beyond getting just what you asked
Of an infinite God, who makes what you have LAST.
You'd never know, should your pain quickly flee,
What it means that "My grace is sufficient for Thee."
Yes, your dreams for your loved one overnight would come true,
But, Oh, the loss! If I lost what I'm doing in you!
So, be silent, My child, and in time you will see
That the greatest of gifts is to get to know Me.
And though oft' may My answers seem terribly late,
My most precious answer of all is still, "WAIT."

- Author Unknown

 I feel like someone secretly wrote this about me.

Reflections on the past year....

As 2011 fades away it feels like a BIG LOONG nightmare is finally coming to an end. As I let the past year slowly run through my mind and reflect on where I was at this time last year it looks pretty sad. I wonder if it will ever change, but then I also have to stop and think of everything I learned in the past year. The things I could not have learned without walking the pathway I have walked. And my thoughts turn now to some of my dear friends who are walking a rough pathway right now. My heart cries out for each one of you and I wish some way to make it all better in a matter of a minute, but that's not the way life is. I can only point you to the one source of hope and strength that got me through this year.....JESUS!!! A few months back when I had a really rough sick week I was complaining to God that I simply couldn't take any more. I just could not get through it, it was TOO much and suddenly this thought came floating down to me, "Where would you be if Jesus had said that when he was going to die on the cross for you??"  And I had to stop and think. What if Jesus hadn't been able to handle the pain of going to the cross. What if he had given up and said I can't take it?? Where would that put all of us??  If Jesus went to the cross for us, then we can get through anything, too. Because guess what we aren't getting through it alone. He is there every moment of every day and night. Every drop of strength we need for any situation in life in right there before us. Most of the time we are looking for strength in every other place then where it really comes from. My challenge to all of you and myself in this new year is to TRUST God more. Believe him. ASK him for strength. You know as long as we try to do things in our own strength God can't help us. He's waiting for us to let go so he can work.
  So hang on! Smile when your world is falling apart around you! Sing through your tears!! GOD IS IN CONTROL!!!!! He just wants us to trust him.  And when you sink at his feet totally shattered, hopeless and ready to give up he gently picks you up and HIS hands hold you until you have strength enough to keep going. How do I know this....because I've felt the strength of the mighty hands of God many times pick me up when I simply could not take another step.

So here I am starting a new blog already. Did not like my xanga set up and decided to go back and rearrange my blogging one and see if I like this one better. Now I need inspiration....no I need time!! :)